Insanity
by Miss-Nick
Summary: "I shut my eyes and the world drops dead; I lift my lids and all is born again. (I think I made you up inside my head.)"


"_I shut my eyes and the world drops dead;_

_I lift my lids and all is born again._

_(I think I made you up inside my head.)"_

**'Mad Girl's Love Song' – Sylvia Plath**

* * *

I see him, as per usual. His light, blond hair a perfect match to his pale skin and dark, gray eyes. He seems to burn a hole through me and he smiles. It's perfect. I run to him and he welcomes it. I have to be dreaming. If I were awake he wouldn't be here. Would he? He greets me with a kiss to my forehead. His lips soft against my skin, he makes me tremble. Now I know I must be dreaming. Nothing this good could be real.

"Hermione, you're back. I missed you."

He missed me. My heart beats loudly. He can probably hear it thumping against my chest.

"I missed you, too, Draco."

I feel his arms wrap around my waist. Warmth. I press myself harder against his chest and I feel him kissing my unruly mane of curls. Wherever I am, I'm his and the feeling elates me. At Hogwarts, he hated me. Here, he loves me.

I smile up at him, not wanting to leave the comfort of his embrace. I don't want to wake from this dream, but I know it's inevitable, so I want to enjoy it. Enjoy him. How crazy am I that I don't even remember the real world when I'm here? What is my reality? All I know is Draco. Draco's eyes, Draco's touch, Draco's scent. That's all I want to know, really. Any other world would be incomplete. Any other life wouldn't even be worth living. Not now that I have him. Even if it isn't real. I breathe him in. I tell myself this may be the last time. He stares at me as if I'm insane. Maybe I am.

"What are you doing?"

"I want to remember how you smell."

"Why?"

"For when I wake up. I want to remember you, Draco."

He looks confused. Why wouldn't he? He doesn't know he isn't real.

"You're not sleeping, Hermione."

I decide not to answer him. What would be the point? I'd rather not spend the only moments I have with him defending my sanity. I already know it's gone.

"The water is lovely."

Again, he looks confused. This time so am I. Can't he see the beautiful lake we're sitting by?

"The lake, silly. Right there."

He doesn't respond. Instead he hands me a phial of some purple liquid. I recognize it, but can't place a name to it. Odd.

"Drink it, Hermione. You'll feel better. I promise."

I feel fine.

"I don't feel ill. What is it for?"

"To help you sleep. Please drink it."

If I'm dreaming, I'm already asleep, silly man.

"Draco, I'm currently sleeping."

"Trust me, please. Drink it, Hermione."

I don't know why I trust him, but something tells me I should – that he's helping me in some way. Maybe it's because I know he can't hurt me while I'm in my own mind. Nobody can. I swallow the liquid. It causes my eyes to open. I'm no longer at the lake. Draco is no longer beside me. I feel alone. Cold. Hungry. Tired. Empty.

* * *

Harry is here, still asleep. I remember I'm helping him search for horcruxes so he can finally defeat Voldemort and put an end to this war. I don't want to be here. I want to sleep. My dreams are my escape and I want to slip back into that world. My world of peace, quiet and love. My world with Draco. It doesn't make sense why I dream of him. That's okay. Whatever my subconscious is trying to tell me, I don't know, but I hope the lesson lasts forever. Even if I made him up. Even if he isn't real. Even if he's imaginary. Even if I'm insane.

All I want to do is sleep now. All I want is to dream him again. I close my eyes and drift back to that place.

* * *

"Is it you, Hermione?"

I smile at him. I feel warm hearing his voice speak my name.

"Of course it's me, Draco. Who else would it be?"

The corners of his mouth lift to a small smile. I want to kiss him.

"Are you dreaming?"

He's never asked me that before. Does my imaginary Draco know he's imaginary? Surely not.

"Yes, Draco. I wish this was real."

He runs to me and places his hands on my shoulders.

"Wake up, Hermione. Wake up."

He starts to shake me violently.

"WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP! PLEASE!"

I don't know why he's screaming. I don't know why he wants me to wake up. Doesn't he know he's not real? He doesn't love me in the real world. Doesn't he know I made this up?

"I can't wake up, Draco! You'll be gone! I made you up!"

"WAKE UP!"

He stops shaking me and I see tears in his eyes. I don't know what's happening. I really am crazy.

* * *

"She's gone again, Potter. It's been three days this time. I don't know what to do."

I miss her, my Hermione. My real Hermione. I want her back again. I look at Potter in desperation. He defeated Voldemort, surely he can help her. Surely he can bring her back.

"I don't know either, Draco. The healers are working hard. You've been giving her the dreamless sleeping draught?"

"Every night. It's not working anymore. My 27 year old wife believes she's 17 and finding horcruxes with you and Weasley. She thinks she dreams _me_. She's hallucinating now, Potter. When she's awake, she thinks we're sitting by a lake. Three days, Potter, my wife has thought I didn't exist. She doesn't know we're married. She doesn't remember our children. She doesn't know how much I love her. She thinks she's dreaming. What about Rosie and Scorpius? They're only two and five years old! They don't understand why their mother doesn't remember them! She was doing well for so long, Potter. Two months! Two months she was completely lucid! Two months she remembered our life together just for it to be ripped away from her at the memory of Weasley's death. You don't understand what it's like to have your wife taken away from you time and time again by a single memory! You don't understand!"

"Give her the dreamless sleeping draught, Draco. Maybe today will be the day."

_Fin._

**A/N:** Review, please! I love hearing your thoughts 3


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